29.8.06
I feeL so HopeLess aND hElplesss.....i aM reAlly sorrY thAt i dO nOt kNow whAt Is gOing thRough your Mind.....i sEriousLy doNt....i stiLL dO Not kNow You weLL enouGh....Why Like thAt.....evEn though i teLl PeoPle i haVe neveR reAlly quarreL WitH You OR wHAt sO evEr bUt hAIz.....whAt i haVe lEft oUt is thAt i am lEft iN teArs most oF thE tIme.....wo zhEn de hEng lEi......wHy Are wE sO diFfereNt fRom oThers....wHY......NevErMind thAt sOme cOuple lIke ahEm scoLd eaCh othEr evEryDay....ITs TheIR forM oF sHowIng Care aNd coNceRn....aNd iTs bEcaUSe sOemoNe caRe fOR thE oTher....thAt is wHy sOMEonE scoLd someoNe.....haiZ....anD i sO enVy gUys whO gIVe ChoColatEs tO tHeir gf......Like aHEm....So sWEet cAN....i wANt aLSo dont haVe......sO You BettEr treAsURe it Leh....EvEn iF hAve cHocolatEs iS aLSo i thE one who giVeS to Him....Haiz.....i reAlly bwg......sO fAr i haVe nEvEr seeN giRls giViNG thEir guY cHocos....aND weLL....shOuld i bE happY or sAd to saY thAt i am thE Few......SerIously i dOnt feeL thE coNcerN....i kNow You aRe rAther stRess Up bY thE faCt i caNt meeT yOU oFten....bUY hEy....spAre a thought fOR me....dO You kNow hOw stRess i aM aT hOme too.....i seRiouSly wOnder iF yOu do.....i bEt i aM feeLing mOre strEss aND pEk chek thAn you......evErYtiME i wAnna go out wiTh yOu....i nEed to thInk a tHousAnd one oF exCuse anD baCk Up fOR mYselF....And What iF my dAd iS tO quEstiOn mE hOw am i goIng to anSwEr him aND suCh....
Slow PAce......Ok so whAt iF i aM sLow pAce...i haVe mY oWn reAsons ...I reSpect anD i lOve MY paReNts....i obEy thEm anD weLL....whEn thEy aSk mE nOt tO dO i wiLL obEy....bUT foR yOu...weLL i alReaDy breAK thE rUles....so whAt dO yOu stiLL wANt frOm me...You aRe to loVe mE foR whO i aM anD oF coUrse nOt whO You wAnt mE tO bE......IF You wANt sOmeone whO doES thINGs yOur wAy....wHy boTher to haVe me......Shitty !! I am alWays cOntrIdictiNg mYselF....One dAy i sAy hOw thANkfUl i am oF hAvIng yOu iN mY lIfe anD thE nExt i aM aSking yOu to find aNothEr giRl......thIS iSn't woRking out.....foR a reLatioNship to work......You should nOt fiGht mORe thAN 2 tIMes a weeK.....weLL We dO nOt fIght....bUt we aRe alWays leFt wiTh sO mUCh hAppIneSs....i dOnt wAnt thIngs to tuRn oUt thIs wAy....SerIouSly i dOnt kNow hOw lOng iT haVe beeN sInce hE lAst reAd mY bloG caUSe iF hE iS to reAd it...He woUld haVe kNown whAt i am gOINg thRough right nOw anD hoW i feeL........ And For goODNess sAke....i sO i dOnt kNow How tO sAy dOEs Not meAn thAt i dOnt kNow wHAt i aM tHInkIng....Arrgh.....
Arrgh.....I am reAlly vEry tirEd tODay........And yOU aRe tOO.....And whEn tWo Tired PEOple talKs.....aha....TroublE coMes.....i jUSt need a breAk fRom aLL thIs mAdnEss.... i want chocolates to cheer me up.....White chocos please...
Peace.
Happy/sad/angry/me?
